Hidden Truths

22 Oct

‘Speak the truth’ is a phrase I grew up listening to.

Saying what I really think or feel does not always come easy to me. Sometimes you have the truth stuck in your head but when it comes to saying it aloud, you just can’t say it.

You know that what you should be doing is speaking up and yet every time you think of speaking up there is a kind of fear- a numbness which seals your mouth.

Your head tells you to go ahead and talk about it but in the same breath it also tells you not to talk about it.

Why does this happen? Do we consciously choose to keep away the truth from those around us? Is it a lack of confidence or plain struggle between emotions and logic?

I remember while growing up, a lot of intense emotions I kept to myself as I feared I would never be understood. Putting the truth out there makes you vulnerable, open to judgment and leaves you with a kind of uncertainty about what would happen next. That is stressful, and it is that stress that paralyzes you makes you retreat into your shell like a tortoise.

Many a time the truth is hidden, not wilfully but as an unconscious reaction to the things you aren’t quite sure how the world will accept.

As much as it is soothing to keep them under wraps, it is tormenting to live with them. Overwhelmed by them you drift through a life interspaced by many blanks. Your true authentic self never gets to be in the forefront. It floats around like a Life in waiting – Waiting to burst out in its fullness.

Maybe you’ve had a good enough reason to keep quiet about certain matters. As much as it hurt a part of you to not talk about it, it also protected a certain part of you and therefore you decided to hold it back. Maybe you didn’t feel ready to talk about it then. You feared losing out on love or acceptance from those who matter to you? You didn’t want to offend anyone or maybe you feared falling in their eyes? Whatever your reason, it was a valid reason then and you don’t need to blame yourself.

With time it begins to dawn upon you that the only way to feel complete is to align yourself with your feelings. It can be terrifying but there is no other way.

Truth can be painful, but I am not sure what is less painful – telling the truth the way it is or wrapping it up with deception.  Holding back or shading the facts make others feel betrayed, hurt and festers relationships while speaking from your heart can be healing, fosters love and strengthens relationships.

Truths sometimes shocks and even upsets people around us.  Let their discomfort not frazzle you. Everyone has an opinion on how life should be lived. Acknowledge their perspectives but express how you feel in a graceful manner. Of course you need to tame your honesty and consider the impact of your words on others so focus on talking about your feelings while being respectful of theirs.

Telling the truth is definitely an expensive option- an option that brings along with it Freedom – A freedom that comes with being real, both with yourself and your loved ones.

As I gaze into the distance, the magnificent Sea- Link Bridge catches my eye ; along side I see a portion of an unfinished bridge. Looking at both of them I am reminded how similar bridge building and being honest is – A lot of effort; but useless unless its complete, but once complete it makes it so much easier to cross the chasms of our relationships.

 

 

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